Thursday, October 19, 2006

The Diaper Chronicles; or, How I Am Going Bankrupt

In the big book of all the things no one ever tells you about parenthood before you become a parent yourself, there must be a chapter on how, when your toddler is beginning the long, circuitous journey that is potty-training, you may find yourself hemorrhaging diapers--and thus, hemorrhaging money--because, though she is not yet willing to actually use the potty chair for its intended purpose, neither will she tolerate for even ONE LITTLE MINUTE having a wet diaper, nor a damp one, nor one with one drop of liquid in it, on her plump two-year-old behind. Think you can convince her otherwise? Think again. Think you can hold her off until the next logical diaper change? No, you cannot. To attempt such folly is to invite weeping, wringing of hands, stomping of feet, and any manner of meltdown. And, to be fair, would YOU want to sit down on a wet bottom to eat your lunch? No, you would not. But people, four diapers in 30 minutes is not good money management. Have you seen what diapers cost? It is insane. Those things are like cellulose gold. I can practically see them transform into crumpled dollar bills as I wrap each one up for the trash: a wasted money pile. A wet money pile, maybe, but still.

I only hope this stage passes quickly and we'll soon go on to the next fun-filled step on the potty-training joyride. You know: the had-an-accident, wet-undies step. Yeehaw.


Jim said...

The only answer is a washable/dryable cloth diaper.

Donna said...

Just remind yourself that when potty training is over you won't be buying diapers anymore! Also, invest in a good carpet cleaner - put that on the Target list! We like Oxi-Clean Carpet cleaner (for cats and kids alike!). Trust me, it'll be worth it; and necessary!

Shan said...

Thanks for the VERY helpful tip, Donna! It's on my list.

Jordan said...

Think of it this way: the sudden need for immediate diaper changes are the perfect preparation for what comes next...the sudden need for an immediate trip to the potty, which is often going to be a lot farther away than the next diaper is right now!

But I have to say, when kids are ready to use the potty they will do it. No amount of coaxing or rewards will get them fully trained...they could be "sort of trained", which is when you deal with a lot of accidents, but if you let them wait until they're really ready, there are usually no accidents.