Tuesday, December 11, 2007

All I Want for Christmas is One Peaceful Meal

So, so tired of meals. Not of eating them myself, of course. Of feeding them to someone else. Of having to jump up every ten seconds to get something (read: more food) for someone who can't get it for herself. Of all the biscuit crumbs and broccoli morsels and chicken salad glops and errant Cheerios and toast crusts and crumbs crumbs crumbs crumbs crumbs that end up on the floor, again--that floor that have I mentioned is COVERED IN CARPET? IN THE DINING ROOM, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD?--that floor that I must get down on my knees and clean up ten million times a day.

And what is with the throwing of food, people? The sassy little fuss-budget scowl as one tosses a handful of polenta with white bean-tomato sauce on the floor? If you don't want any more of it, YOU CAN LEAVE IT ON YOUR TRAY.

Is it any wonder that the office Christmas party-luncheon attended by my spouse yesterday afternoon, involving potluck-style goodies, complicated punch, and unidentified hotdishes (that would be casseroles, to my non-Minnesotan readers) sounds, oh, about as luxurious as a three-day spa weekend? Because I would bet you that no one at that party was throwing handfuls of french-onion dip on the floor. At least, I hope not. And even if they were, it wouldn't be MY responsibility to clean it out of the carpet.

However! Having said all that, I must mention that last year at this time I had a newborn and was so brutally sleep-deprived that I accidentally used a debit card for a defunct checking account and consequently bounced checks--twice!--AND unwittingly left a shopping bag full of just-purchased Christmas gifts in a cart in the Target parking lot and drove away without it. So, you know, it could always be worse.


donna said...

Amen to the peaceful meal! More often than not, I feel like a waitress during dinner!

Shan said...

Me too! But where are the tips?!

Katie said...

I'll second that Amen. I'm lucky I guess to have hardwood floors under my own kitchen table, which still shows every single crumb and food morsel to be dropped, brushed, or flung onto the floor along with the smear of spilled milk hastily mopped up with a paper napkin. But I'm working on a way to utilize petrified Rice Krispies as some kind of industrial strength bonding agent. I'll be a millionaire yet!

Jordan said...

Hee! I remember the Target debacle! That's a good yardstick to see how far you've come!

We have a rug under the table - I don't know where I'd be without the dustbuster - and a 7-year old who loves to use it! Jumping up and down all through the meal drives me nuts. We've worked hard at the whole, "Mom/Dad, while you're up..." routine and will often make them wait a while before getting back up if they don't ask for things while we're up. So there's hope later on! (And imagine, when our kids were really little, our dining room table was TWO rooms away from the kitchen (there was no room for a table in our old kitchen)!