Wednesday, April 04, 2012

Traumatic Premature Swimsuit Syndrome


photo courtesy Old Navy


Although I have been thrilled with the mild, barely-there "winter" we had and freakishly-early spring we are currently experiencing in MN this year, there is no denying its one major downside: one has been forced to face summery clothes an entire month or two earlier than usual. And let's be frank. That's two months' less time in which to whip one's doughy, neglected body into something resembling an appropriate body-baring shape.

This is when one regrets, for example, the thirteen dozen cookies from the Christmas Cookie Exchange. I mean, whose thighs are ready to be bared to the world in March, or even early April? Seriously? Perhaps a 15-year-old girl's, but definitely NOT a forty-something-year-old wife and mom's. (Wow, that makes me sound really old. For the record, I'm barely forty-something. In fact, I prefer to think of myself as post-thirty-something.)

It doesn't help that I'm once again (or still) an injured runner. I was fine for a couple of months, then I was sick for the entire month of February, and when I resumed running after that, I may have jumped back into my normal running schedule a little too fast, causing my OTHER hip and glute to respond with anger and resentment. So now I'm back to hobbling out a few miles here and there, envying every healthy runner that zips by and experiencing post-traumatic flashbacks of getting cortisone shots in my rear. (NEVER. AGAIN.) In case you were wondering, hobbling two or three miles now and then is not sufficient to undo the damage inflicted by the Christmas Cookie Exchange. And since I'm used to having until late May to solve that problem, well... it's not going well.

On the other hand, having spring in what is normally winter is so unbelievably awesome it leads me to realize that I probably should relocate to a different state. I can't assume that winter in MN is going to be like this from now on, and I've heard there are places you can live that don't snow you in for six months of every year. Intriguing.

What about you? How's the weather where you live? And what are you doing for YOUR Bikini Body Countdown? (Which should more accurately be called Forty-something Mom-Style Swimsuit For Concealing Wobbly Bits Body Countdown, in my case.)

Fill me in, mamas.

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