Thursday, March 21, 2013

Winter, Spring Break, and Hypochondria. Fun Times.

So today is the last day of tennis. THANK GOD.

No, actually, Genevieve has really liked it. After her initial rant against all things tennis--which, honestly, is so typical of the sort of ridiculous things little children do--she has had a great time each week. Julia, on the other hand....not so much. Despite both girls being good at it--racquets actually make contact with balls--Julia hates every second. Or so she tells us. I have no idea why. She just does. Many tears and much begging not to go are involved. Makes Thursday night dinner (right before tennis) a lovely affair, let me tell you.

OK, so, my firstborn is not going to be the next Maria Sharapova. We've determined that. Onward.

This week has been absolutely crazy. To get a sense of just how crazy, consider this: today is the first day this week that I will have children in school for a full day. On Monday, the kids were released from school early because of a blizzard. On Tuesday, the kids started school late because of the blizzard. On Wednesday, it was the usual weekly Late Start day for teachers' education/training. Let me tell you, I don't know whether I'm coming or going this week. Oh, and it's the last week of school before spring break, which means that perhaps I should have started planning what the heck I'm going to do with two children home all day for ten days (counting weekends) straight, starting on Saturday, when the weather is still appropriate to mid-January rather than almost April. (The windchill has actually been below zero every morning this week.)

OMG. I have no idea what we're going to do for all that time. I'm a little (very) scared (terrified).

Most likely, another reason I don't know which end is up this week is that I've been distracted by paranoid fears of ovarian cancer. It seems like I've been hearing and reading a lot of things about ovarian cancer lately. There was a New York Times column about a recent study showing how inadequate ovarian cancer treatment tends to be in this country. I heard a story about ovarian cancer on NPR. A friend told me that a friend of hers had died of ovarian cancer the year before--in her mid-thirties--leaving four children behind, including a two-year-old.

You all know about ovarian cancer, right? About how it's almost always deadly, because people tend to have no idea they have it until it's too late? About how the symptoms, if one even has any, are nondescript complaints that healthy people experience all the time--bloating, indigestion, stomachaches, a few extra pounds in the belly area? And so it can be there, growing, while you obliviously note that you've got gas pains and you maybe should lay off the potato chips? Um, yeah--that.

So I heard and read all these stories right around the time--within the past few weeks--that I happened to gain a few pounds--most visible in my belly--and start feeling sort of bloated and weird. Which clearly meant I have ovarian cancer, and that I'm going to die soon and leave my young children motherless.

But then yesterday it occurred to me that maybe before I assume I have ovarian cancer because of weight gain and a bloated belly, perhaps I should first try EATING HEALTHY. It occurred to me that, between birthdays, Girl Scout cookie season, Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, upcoming Easter, parties, playdates, dinners with friends, and lots of cozy baking to ward off winter's chill, there has been an excess of desserts, pastries, cookies, jelly beans, chips, brownies, etc. in my life as of late. I may have been mindlessly snacking on jelly beans and mint chocolate chip cookies more than I should have.

And it occurred to me that perhaps I should experiment by eating more fruits, vegetables, lean proteins, and omega-3s, and drinking more water and green tea, while laying off the junk food and baked goods, for a few weeks before I panic and rush to the doctor convinced that I am dying.

I know, I'm brilliant. Why consider the most obvious and logical reason for a larger waistline when one can keep one's self awake at night convinced that one has cancer? 

So, I'm eating healtheir to see if that takes care of the problem. I'll let you know how it goes.

Sigh. Perhaps I just need the distraction of SPRING.

No comments: